Somebody needs to explain to Netflix that they’ve been sleeping on some of the most cinematic material on Earth, and it’s all happening in Benin City. Forget true crime, forget royal scandals; here are some moments that deserve the full documentary treatment, complete with dramatic narration and unnecessary slow-motion shots.
1. The Flyover
A flyover is infrastructure. It exists so cars can move from point A to point B without causing a scene. Nobody, anywhere in the history of civil engineering, designed a flyover to be a tourist attraction. And yet, here we are, watching people climb up in their best outfits, phones out, taking pictures like it’s the Eiffel Tower. Somebody needs at least three episodes on how a road accessory became a whole content destination.
2. The Abuse of “Luxury” and “Aesthetic”
These two words have been abused more than any hard drug you can think of. “Luxury” used to mean something: a state of great comfort and refined taste. “Aesthetics” used to describe a particular visual style or philosophy.
Now, just put velvet, a boxed package, and some ambient lighting, and suddenly it’s automatically aesthetic or luxurious.
At this point, the words need a support group, not a documentary, but we’ll settle for a documentary.
3. Book Adaptations That Have Nothing to Do With the Book
You read the book. You loved the book. You cried, you underlined passages, you told everyone about the book. Then the movie comes out, and somehow the main character has a different personality, a subplot has appeared from nowhere, and the ending is completely different for “creative reasons.” Somebody needs to sit these directors down, under oath, and ask them what happened.
4. Benin City: The Land of Apartments, Clubs, and Restaurants (and Nothing Else)
Drive through Benin City and count how many new short-let apartments, clubs, and restaurants have opened this month. Now try counting anything else. A bookstore. A proper recreational park. Anything. It’s giving “we only believe in three industries” energy, and somebody needs to investigate how we collectively decided this was the business plan.
Netflix really needs to stop giving documentary deals to people involved with love scams and mysterious inheritances and start paying attention to real cinematic material.
Because the ideas are flowing and history is in the making.
This is the culture. Somebody call a producer.
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